Folks, first up let’s all bow our heads for a moment of silence, as “Bed Intruder Song” dropped out of the Billboard Hot 100 after a lone week on the chart. It was fun while it lasted, Antoine Dodson—hope you went out, rolled deep and had lots of classy sex.
On a far less glamorous note, Eminem and Rihanna’s “Love The Way You Lie” has now been #1 for six weeks, giving Ri Ri a total of 11 weeks at the top of the Hot 100 this year if you include “Rude Boy.” Meanwhile, it was announced this week that she has yet another single (”Only Girl”—out next month) and another album (her fifth) due for release by year’s end.
B.o.B’s third single “Magic” cracks the Top 10 this week and features Rivers Cuomo. It’s the Weezer frontman’s second Top 10 hit after his band’s “Beverly Hills” climbed to #10 back in…
Wow. One of the most bland pop tunes of the year, B.o.B’s “Nothin’ On You,” has managed to repeat its American success overseas by topping the UK chart this week. Meanwhile, classy trash like Ellie Goulding’s “Guns And Horses” goes in at #26.
I’m completely stunned into boredom, otherwise I’d summon up the strength to rant on about why “Guns And Horses” totally deserves to match the success of Ellie’s previous single, “Starry Eyed.” I will say that I finally broke down and ordered her album from Amazon UK last weekend. Should be here tomorrow, along with a Rick Astley’s remastered SAW albums. Hoo-razzle.
Anyway, be sure to check out the fourth installment of Pop Trash Addicts’ Pop Panel, where we review “Guns And Horses” and another of this week’s UK entries, “The Flood” by Katie Melua (#35).
The U.K. Top 10:
1. “Nothin’ On You” - B.o.B feat. Bruno Mars *new* *1 week*
2….
This week rude boys B.o.B and Bruno Mars bump Rihanna off the #1 position on the Billboard Hot 100 with their highly-overplayed spring hit "Nothin' On You." Still, RiRi's "Rude Boy" managed to become her second longest-running single at the top of the chart (at five weeks—"Umbrella" was the longest with seven weeks) as a featured performer. (T.I.'s "Live Your Life," which features her on guest vocals, was also #1 for five weeks.) And as for B.o.B, his new single "Airplanes," which features that broad Hayley Williams from Paramore, debuts at #12.
Ke$ha lands a third Top 10 hit with "Your Love Is My Drug," which flies up ten positions to #9—despite what some are calling a disastrous performance on SNL last weekend. (Additionally, Animal leaps up from #16 to #8 on the Top 200 Albums chart.) You say disaster, I say gold-plated triumph!
Witness the New Queen Of Soul at her most stunning, chyldren:
That brings us to Adam Lambert, who deserves some congrats for finally dragging his Max Martin jam "Whataya Want From Me" into the upper reaches of the chart at #10. It's been a long haul. And, correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't this make him the first artist to come out as openly gay to have a Top 10 hit in the U.S. off their debut album? (Obviously geezers like Elton John had hits after they publicly came out.)
Christina Aguilera debuts at #23 with her new whore jam "Not Myself Tonight," while Lady Gaga—who Xtina has been pitted against recently in the press—nabs her seventh Top 40 hit with the Ace Of Base-y "Alejandro" (again, the best jam off The Fame Monster along with "Monster"). It's up to #28 this week.
Meanwhile, a post-Coachella La Roux also score a legitimate Top 40 hit in the States! Did you ever think you'd see it happen? "Bulletproof" climbs 12 spots to #36!
And then we have the Glee cast, who manage four debuts on the Hot 100 this week from the first new episode of the spring: "Gives You Hell" at #32, "Hello" at #35, "Hello Goodbye" at #49, and "Hello, I Love You" at #66. I have to say, the writing on these first two new episodes...? WEAK. It's like that pile of garbage Mamma Mia, where they're now just Scotch-taping the plots around the songs (very poorly, I might add), rather than selecting tunes that go with a strong storyline. Careful with the stunt song-ing, Glee—TV viewers are a fickle pack.
Wrapping up the Hot 100, Selena Gomez And The Scene's "Naturally"—my favorite new jam—rebounds this week, and moves up from #40 to #37. It had previously peaked at #29.
And on a final note, Ye Olde Vampyre Madonna's live Sticky & Sweet album falls like an ancient prostitute whose knees just gave out after her 46,968th blow job. Actually, that's not too many, is it? Makes me kind of nostalgic for junior high school...
The U.S. Top 10:
1. "Nothin' On You" - B.o.B feat. Bruno Mars *1 week* 2. "Rude Boy" - Rihanna 3. "Hey, Soul Sister" - Train 4. "Break Your Heart" - Taio Cruz feat. Ludacris 5. "Need You Now" - Lady Antebellum 6. "In My Head" - Jason Derulo 7. "Telephone" - Lady Gaga feat. Beyonce 8. "OMG" - Usher feat. will.i.am 9. "Your Love Is My Drug" - Ke$ha 10. "Whataya Want From Me" - Adam Lambert
